7 days! That's it...only 7 more days until my 24th year of life ends. No, I'm not turning 25...let me explain: When you throw a baby's 1st birthday party, it's because they have been alive for 1 year. A 2nd birthday party celebrates the completion of 2 years, having been alive for 2 full years. Therefore, a 24th birthday is the celebration of the completion of my 24th year on this planet. I'm having serious anxiety about getting older.
My mom raised me to never care about age, that age was just a number...but what little kid doesn't want to get older? It was so cool to turn "double digits", awesome was the year you were officially a "teen", 16, 18...I made 19 the best year of my life because it was the last year I could say I was a teenager...then it was a race to 21, 22 aka "double deuces"...23 was nothing special in particular. But as I creep closer and closer to the quarter century mark (25), I'm beginning to feel that fear typically associated with getting older.
I know so many people with college degrees, starting careers that they love; I know other people married, having children, starting families they've always wanted; all of this makes me feel...behind. I'm in a job I can't really stand, I don't have my college degree, I'm not getting married any time soon and I'm definitely not having kids yet...and I know that there is no timeline for these things, everyone's personal and professional advancements are their OWN choices, for THEM, what works for THEIR life. But I can't help but feel like I'm doing something wrong. I'm eerily close to 25 years old, much closer to 30 than 18, and I feel like I'm no furhter along than I was when I graduated high school.
Don't get me wrong. I am very happy to be turning 24, soon after 25. I have no qualms with BEING older. However, I fear that I'm not where I "should" be at this point in my life. I will soon be one quarter of one century old...shouldn't I be, like, doing something with my life by now? IDK...updates on aging as they come.
...well that was alot more depressing than I thought it was going to be...hahaha
Stress has been bountiful...I'm struggling with moving out and possibly losing my state job. Lots of back story to the whole situation, but needless to say, I've been a major stress case as of late.
This weekend, my mom and I are going to the St Patrick's Day Parade and Festival in Old Sacramento. So excited, as I've never been to the Sacramento festivities. Since I'll be out of town for her birthday (which is 9 days from now), we are doing our annual combo birthday celebration Saturday night. I love celebrating our birthdays together. :)
Road trip next week...7+ hours south of the bay area...heaven help me. Trapped in a car with 2 boys for 7+ hours?! hahaha JK...I'm driving down to SoCal with BS and AW, two of my favorite guys in the world! I'm so excited for their friend's wedding...weddings in general excite me. :)
Happy Thursday, readers. Hope you have a great weekend ahead of you!! <3 me
Thursday, March 10, 2011
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